hisssssss

how do i cram the rest of my life into 10+yrs? i'll be lucky to live that long. my blood is not cooperating. i take INF injections 3x/week. the brain tumor lurks menacingly. it'll be fine, they say. till its NOT, i say! here one minute, gone the next. just like before.

i woke from those seizures a different person. i see things from a different perspective. i just BE different.

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my mortality. it sucks. know why? cuz its a heavy burden to bare--even if it turns out to be untrue. kind of a lose/lose situation, no matter how it faces up.

its given me an insight tho into something i need to pay attention to. before its too late: my history of journaling. since 1972. except that NOW is time. the time is NOW! while i remember my on-line passwords....and my blogger name....while i have this forum to speak....i have got to put it ALL down, before i can't.

*old friend* turned on the switch several years ago. he was the catalyst for change. he enabled me to access this special side of myself. a side that must remain anonymous...but yet allows me to share...emote. personally i see it as a win/win. i will not always have this luxury of time. it must be let out. like steam...